Not to be worn in public.

These scare me. It's like all of the fuzzy horrors of sesame street have some to life and are now deciding to eat people's feet. These are not to be worn in public. Ever. Under any circumstances. Please just go and get a real shoe.

For bed? Yes. For housework? Maybe. For the grocery store? No. For work? Don't even think about it! These are not to be worn in public!! Sweatpants are pajamas and are to be worn only to bed or around the house when you are not having an company!

How do you even move your arms in this thing!? Are you dragging your tassels in the soup? Do you really WANT to look fat? This is one of the ugliest colors I have ever seen...ever. Cat puke seems to be the main ingredient as far a color goes. How dare you ever even think about wearing anything like this?!? I need to go get my composure back before I start hyperventilating.

You are not five years old

I like the shape of the purse. What I dislike is that you are using trash to form your accessories. Where do the rest of your clothes come from? I mean really, it looks like you just joined the kool-aid brigade. This purse just screams "INSANE".

Silly people...

Don't forget to check my older posts. I wish they could all be on the same page, but unfortunately blogger has not learned to read my mind. Maybe I will just transfer everything to a live journal. If you are not familiar with blogger, there is a link at the bottom of this page that says older posts. Also, on the right hand side of the screen, you should see a box with info about me in it. There is another link on the bottom where you can look at all of my other blogs. Like, What TO Wear, and Modest and Sheek. Don't bother to look at the other one. I tried to delete it but it didn't work.

Old people need to get a grip

There is a reason why these are called tennis shoes. They are only good for tennis. Wearing them outside of the tennis court is vulgar. It is also rude to the people around you who are being blinded by your shiny new shoes. No, they do not go with everything. In fact I might venture to say they don't go with anything. (matching is not the same as going by the way) These are characteristic of some old retired woman (and in the really horrible cases a man) who is on vacation in Florida who does not own a mirror.

This is the reason why dumb blond jokes were created. If you wear a fanny pack, whether it is like this one or not, for the good of the world please toss it out of your window. They are called fanny packs mainly because they make your stomach look like there is a "fanny" growing out of it. Would it kill you to get a purse? You know you have a problem when your co-workers think you have a stomach tumor.

A sad euphemism...

When I first saw these shorts, it took me a minute to get my sight back, but as soon as I did I threw up. These are being called tropical walking shorts. It is nothing but a sad euphemism for an uglier version of the cargo short. Tropical my foot. Look at how low the crotch looks!! And they are pulled up way too high I can only imagine the horrors of the shoes that go with this outfit. I mean this is so upsetting. These things make me want to go get a shovel and bury them deep, deep, deep under ground. Let the mole people eat it.The matching top isn't exactly that peachy either.